My One Adjustment That Worked: The Way I Conquered Post-Work Tension Through an Unexpected Discovery in the Loft

I frequently become like a coiled spring once the workday ends. My shoulders grow tense, my breath turns fast and shallow. Typically, closing my laptop with a thud would be followed by the squeak of a cork pulled from a bottle of red, the wine hastily sploshed into a glass, that first mouthful putting a much-needed full stop on the working day.

Later, a few months ago, I discovered my now-adult son’s old school recorder in the attic. I idly blew into it, instantly reminded of the time when it drove me crazy – his daily practice a violent assault on my eardrums, the piercing shriek still reverberating through my head hours after he had gone to bed.

But rather than consigning it to the bin, I brought it downstairs, together with a beginner’s songbook. Growing up, I had no musical talent whatsoever. I’d had recorder lessons at infant school, but never had the opportunity to learn other instruments.

Searching online for recorder tutorials, I watched dozens of YouTube videos aimed at children, and printed out a fingering chart. I searched “easiest recorder tunes”, I felt excited when I played a recognizable Twinkle Twinkle Little Star. Yes, it was something your average five-year-old could master before first break, but as a tone deaf, impatient and stressed 51-year-old, it seemed like a major triumph.

My son questioned my actions (and please could I stop), but I kept going – I enjoyed the sensation the recorder gave me. Forgetting notes easily forced me to focus on the music sheet, and carefully mimic the finger placements. My breath calmed, I was focused, and once I’d mastered that first faltering tune, I felt euphoric. I had managed to play music.

Today, several months later, I can “play” other nursery rhymes and a passable Ode to Joy. Yes, my timing is rubbish, and I still need to write the names of the notes down, but to me, it’s not about being skilled or a “musician” – it’s purely about the joy it provides and the fact I can’t think of anything else when I am playing.

I learned that few kids play the recorder today, which probably relieves parents, yet it made me wistful for my school years, and my son’s childhood.

I try to pick up my recorder every evening after work as my first activity, and during those 20 minutes, I am in my own little world. And afterwards, I feel refreshed and happy.

My friends think it’s hilarious, yet a therapist friend informed me that I was reducing stress, but improving my cognitive skills, such as memory and auditory processing, which is invaluable at my time of life. And in terms of my day-to-day wellbeing, it’s a real “ode to joy” indeed.